The Edge of the World

Yeah, it's been quite a while since I last posted another entry. The reason I'm about to say is overused, so if I were you, I wouldn't even bother.

Today's unusually slow. Everything around me is: from my torrent's download speed to my mind's activity. It's probably because I ate light brunch. Or wait, it might not even be related. Ah, and yes, today is dad's birthday. I think he's 51 now. Congratulations, old man. I also sent him a message last night. It goes like this:

Decode the following message by filling appropriate characters into the blanks:

_e dr_ws a _leasing _icture of eternit_. The _looming _rises cho_us incessan_ly, _eartily _ancing _s the da_s pass by.

Strange, I still remember it.

Anyway, the download speed is... still slow, unfortunately. Normally, it's around 250-300 kbps (BTW, I moved to another shop), but now... 50-120 kbps.

You might ask, "What are you doing right now?", well, as usual, I'm downloading stuff. I'm still waiting for a 2GB file to get finished, and browsing some o2mania songs. Oh, and the latest chapters of Bakuman. I'm also reading my best friend's blog - well, she actually -(forced)- told me to read it.

I wanna go home now. Since I also brought my laptop, it's kinda scary to go home alone. I'm also hungry. So, I have to wait for a friend (he's an assistant at the shop I frequent to), and since he goes to the same direction I live in, it's pwning two espers with Touma's Dispel ability.

Oh yeah, I'm writing another story. Its genres are Drama, Romance and Tragedy. Even though the progress is at around 15 percent, I can already visualize the ending. I actually have two endings, and I'm still wondering which one should I choose. The title? It's called...


Sekai no Hashikko.

Solitary Saturday

It's been a while since I did something like this. I haven't had the time to blog, let alone, access my accounts. I've been pretty busy lately; busy pro-cras-ti-lax-ing, that is. Damn it.

"Someday... I will escape these dark chasms!"

I've... had enough... I'll make this my last. And this coming November, I'll...

...


Well, anyway, I'm alone right now, inside Aunt's house. I'm busy doing nothing (uploading stuff, actually, and updating my OS). And yes, I also received a call from a certain client. Aunt owns a bakery, and since I'm the only one here (my siblings and my cousin aren't here, apparently), I have no other choice but to attend to those orders/calls and/or whatnot. Seriously, this is pretty troublesome. But, on the bright side, I can use the internet... FOR FREE! Though it's not that fast, IT. IS. FREE! That's better than nothing. WAY better.

What else... Sakurahana (the forum I frequent) is taking ages to load. Server problems, perhaps? Or is my internet that slow? I doubt it. Plurk's loading just fine.

Speaking of Plurk, they have this... new function called "Plurk Lottery", which I believe is pretty vain (just like that "Daily Photo"). I understand that lottery = chance/event/random, but they could have used a different term for it. I'd love to post name recommendations here but I'm too lazy, so I guess I'll pass. And most people would get the impression of games and such. Anyway, Plurk Lottery is a new function developed by Plurk which allows users to chat different users. In simpler terms, click "Play Plurk Lottery" and you'll be given a chance to chat with a random user. Oh well, I'm not really interested.

One Hundred and Sixty Eight Hours Remain

Mood: World-weary

Yesterday (A few minutes before the hour hand stroke at 12 AM, actually), was Mother's Day. Since yesterday was Mother's Day, my family and a few of our relatives had decided to go on an outing. The venue was Al-Ma'ather Park (again) located inside King Faisal Hospital. The fee was 2 SR per head. The "we are the member's acquaintances, so let us in" technique didn't work, unfortunately.

Our post-lunch consisted of porridge, bread (I dunno what kind), Aunt's special chocolate cake, Pralines 'n Cream and Strawberry Sorbet Ice Cream from Baskin Robins, softdrinks and water. I do not drink softdrinks anymore, so I chose water instead. The strawberry ice cream was glorious.

They discussed about life. It was boring. I only listened to them occasionally; I was listening to music until the outing ended. BTW, I also had fun listening to YUI's albums. Especially the songs, Blue Wind and Tomorrow's Way.

We arrived home after a couple of hours. It was okay. I also experienced taking a nap under the Phoenix Dactylifera. Well, it wasn't a nap actually. It was more like a "lie down and rest for a few minutes".

Oh yeah, on our way home, I also learned that we may leave this country in a week. I'm not quite sure yet. I don't feel like going back to the Philippines yet. If the flight may be moved on a later date, at around 25-30th, I'd be totally happy. Please, let me stay here for a while.

Bidding Farewell to the 18 Year Old Alain

Time has passed by without me even realizing. I feel... sick. Not because of a virus that have penetrated my body or something, but it feels like I have leaped through time. It's an unpleasant feeling, really. I really want to scream, "Bring back my childhood!" right now, but then again...

Relatives visited our place a while ago. They brought food, food and more food. I really liked the chocolate ice cream cake my aunt brought. I wanted to take a picture of it, but the cake diminished before I could get a shot. Damn. Also, my cousins brought their laptops with them, leeching our internet connection. I was like... "This is insanity." Four, no. FIVE! personal computers were raping the internet connection! Mine, our desktop, two of my cousin's, and lastly, my sister's. My download speed has slowed down by a hundredfold, unfortunately. I also had a hard time fixing my cousin's wireless. Well, my dad was the one who solved the problem, actually. But, I still think that my dad wouldn't have done it if it wasn't because of me. Figures...

It was fun, nonetheless. We played DotA. A single round; two on two. And yes, we won. To be honest, they weren't that much of a challenge.

My relatives left in a few hours, with the ice cream cake and ice cream leftover in the fridge. My aunt also gave me SR 100. Finally, I can buy that 500GB HDD. I'm going to download stuff to my heart's content before leaving. Only 12 days remain, and I'm leaving for the Philippines again, sad to say. Also, I have to spend my summer in the Philippines. This is the worst...

JSYK, that (banner) above was made by my "cute little sister", Micchan. Thank you. *hugs*

Daryll's 16th Birthday; Another Reunion

I just came back from aunt's place, and it was a bit tiring. But, hey, I stuffed myself! From fried chicken to fries to coleslaw to spaghetti to pizza to cassava cake to fruit cakes and cakes, and cakes, and to more cakes...to be honest, I couldn't ask for more. A few relatives were also invited to have dinner at aunt's place. We chatted, and played a little. It was okay. Anyway, here are the pictures I took:







My plate.



And this...is my favorite. I only had a slice, though.

Fries. Headset. Flood. Butterfly Swimmer?

Monday Blu- Wait. Today's Wednesday...

Overcast sky. Strong breeze. Slight drizzle. I love the weather tonight. But what is this discomfort I feel? Neck aches, neck aches, and more neck aches. To top things up, the extreme slowness of the internet speed adds to the agony (Slow browsing, and unstable torrent speed). Keep 'em coming, seriously.

I'm done whining. The power nap from earlier somehow lessened the pain. Hanezawa Kana-san's Ren 'Ai Circulation is music to my ears. What more can I ask for? Ah, yes. Dad asked one of his colleagues to fix my laptop's keyboard. He paid SR 100 for it. I received the "polished" laptop this morning. Lappy's okay now, except that the speakers aren't fixed yet.

Speakers, speakers, and more speakers. My brother bought new set of speakers (Creative SBS A300) for only SR 100. Everything's fine and dandy, until my brother asked me for SR 50. Oh, come on now. Here's a little info about it, and of course, a picture.



My rating? 3.5/5

Al-Ma'ather Memorial Cave Park

One week ago, three days after arriving here in Riyadh, we were invited by Uncle to visit the park; a sweet reunion. We've been there a couple of times (the last visit was the fifth, if my memory serves me right). We sometimes go there by noon with my family and relatives to eat lunch.




Splendid view, isn't it? I took the pictures with my N5100. More pictures.







I have more pictures, but they are somehow identical to the pictures posted above. Hm. Al-Ma'ather Memorial Cave Park is WITHIN the King Faisal Specialist Hospital and Research Center compound.

We spent two hours at the park; ate dinner, played badminton, and enjoyed the calming scenery. We arrived home in 15 minutes, and had doughnut from Krispy Kreme and milk for midnight snack. IMHO Krispy Kreme > Dunkin' Donuts

Chocoverload

Decent internet = restored. I am happy. Everybody is happy. Of course, that includes our dog named, Angie. Rhyming stuff aside, yesterday was mom's birthday. It was tiring, but fun. Mom baked brownies. And those weren't ordinary brownies.



Here are some leftovers from last night. I really recommend dipping it on Nutella or any chocolate spread.





Ah, and don't mind my hairclip.

4:23 PM. I was thinking. It would be great if the brownies (coated in chocolate spread) were accompanied by chocolate milk. Well, what do you know? A few minutes ago, mom brought us glasses of cold chocolate milk. Truly an unexpected occurrence. I shall now challenge myself. Brownies + Nuttela + Cold Chocomilk and of course, Chocolate Pudding!







Update: It was a fierce battle. I reigned supreme with my left fist thrown in the air. I couldn't finish the brownies, though. My throat would be severed if I went any further. It was sweet. Too sweet the chocolate milk almost tasted like cold water. It was okay.

An Hour and a Thirty Minute Stay at HKIA

It was an unforgettable soujourn. And I never knew there were trains underground! It really was a fascinating experience. We didn't have the time to check the place out. It was already time for our departure when we arrived at the gate. HKIA was huge. At least three times the size of KKIA. No. Make that...a HUNDREDFOLD!










I couldn't take proper pictures. Excited, perhaps? No matter.

The New Plaster Room

It has been a while since I last updated my blog. A week without internet is a pain. I'm at Dad's office right now, leeching internet connections. This is only a once-in-a-scarlet-sky opportunity, so I'll take my chances. Here are some pictures I took a few minutes ago.

Tranquil Sunday

10:09 AM, Sunday. I had a sound, 9-hour sleep. I’m leaving this town tomorrow noon, and the next day will be our flight. I was somehow relieved when my parents told me that our flight was rescheduled. That way, I can still download stuff before Tuesday arrives. I managed to download thirteen parts of F/SN yesterday. I just hope today’s internet speed is fast.

10:20 AM, Sunday. Dad asked me to attend today’s mass, for today is the last time I’ll be attending one. At least, I won’t be able to attend the masses for the next two months. I’m still having second thoughts. I haven’t attended any masses since last year. I wonder, does that make me more sinful? Does that make me more evil? We were told plenty of times by our seniors and aged people to visit the church at least every Sunday. A couple of years ago, when I was still attending masses, I have been observing the people inside the church. And I could tell that 80% of them weren’t even serious about praying. The remaining 20% were the true, devout believers. After the priest’s sermon, one person would bring her cell phone out, and then the other person would do the same. A scenario I have seen countless times; a vicious cycle.

10:45 AM, Sunday. I just remembered something about a photo on National Emo Day. I was like, “What the hell is this…?” when I first saw the photo. Here it is.



Trash. Rubbish. Nonsense…

12:07 PM, Sunday. Aunt brought me eggplant omelet for breakfast. It wasn’t bad, but it wasn’t that good, either. It was passable. Ah, yes. We had a match last night with outsiders. They weren’t much of a challenge, to be honest. Our victory has been decided from the very beginning. The match lasted only for 40 minutes. And as always, we went all out, without showing a hint of mercy. [My stats: 8/0/16 (Kill/Death/Assists respectively)]

The Dull Sky. A Gentle Foreboding

6:45 AM, Friday. The keys Esc, F1 to F4, Tab, 1, Caps Lock, Q, A, and Z from my keyboard has ceased functioning. Darn it. And here I thought it was only the right key that has stopped working. Who would’ve known? And I never knew typing on the on-screen keyboard would be such a hassle. My typing speed has slowed down dramatically, and to top things up, I wouldn’t be able to use the most convenient keyboard shortcuts (i.e. Select-all, Undo, Task-switching, etc.) anymore unless a technician repairs it. I am still inexperienced, so fixing it by me is out of the question. Here’s a screenshot of my trouble. (Notice that I have been listening to Mami Kawada’s latest album, “Linkage”, for a while now.)



7:05 AM, Friday. See? It consumed 20 minutes of my life just to type those 105 characters above. Anyway, I already packed my things last night, and I’m somehow ready to leave this damned dormitory. If all things go smoothly, we can leave this country tomorrow noon, if my sister gets the professor’s approval, that is. [Reminder to self: Animu/Eroge DVDs is stocked inside my suitcase (000)] I still need to wait for my parents call, though. If my sister doesn’t get the approval, which is most likely to happen, our booking will be rescheduled. I’m fine either way, but I really want to leave as soon as possible.

7:23 AM, Friday. I’m waiting for my Aunt’s breakfast. This might be the last time I would be having breakfast in this town. I’m getting hungry. By the way, I just had a haircut yesterday. To be honest, it was…a huge failure. I want to skin that gay hairdresser alive for ruining my hair. A hairdresser that ruins hair; what perfect irony. I somehow predicted that that would happen. Should I be glad I didn’t get my hopes up? That aside, I’m sleep-deprived. I hit the sack at 1:30 AM, and woke up at 6:30 AM. Now tears are starting to form in my eyes.

7:32 AM, Friday. Everything happened so suddenly. Time just passed me by without me noticing it. It seemed like yesterday was 10 months ago. It felt like I leapt through time. I…honestly hate this feeling. If this is a dream, someone please end it.

8:34 AM, Friday. I received a call from Mom. She told me that I have to wait for 3 PM. Only then will I know if my sister is exempted from the exams. I still have six hours and a half. I guess I’ll watch some animu for the time being.

11:38 AM, Friday. I just woke up from a fleeting dream. I couldn’t remember what I dreamt of. I should take a shower now.

2:46 PM, Friday. I have yet to receive mom's call. Here I am, sitting idly in front of the monitor. That aside, I finally remembered the dream. I lost against temptation, and had coitus with a beautiful woman. That was all I could remember. I've been having weird dreams lately.

2:57 PM, Friday. Finally. I received a call from mom. But what awaited me was bad news. The time increased from three PM to five PM. This isn't my day.

Uncertainties

9:55 AM, Thursday. I feel so drained. It’s mostly because I slept at 4:30 this morning. My head hurts. You may be asking why I slept so late. Well, I was probably excited. Today’s already March 25. I’m leaving this country in a few days. Like I said in the previous entry, it might be on the 27th, or the 30th of March depending on the circumstances. The very reason for the flight rebooking is because my sister isn’t done with her final examinations yet. She’s still waiting for her professor’s approval if she can take her exam-scheduled-on-Friday today so we can leave this country by the 27th. But I have yet to hear news from her, let alone my parents. I guess I’ll have to stay in this town a little longer. I’m not quite sure if I should be happy with this. Leaving by the 30th of March means downloading more stuff. But I really want to go home as soon as possible.

10:22 AM, Thursday. Aunt arrived earlier than usual. She said that there were a lot of students withdrawing at the bank opposite to this dormitory, and she badly needs the money. She told me that she’ll pay me later, so I lent her 500 pesos without hesitation. Anyway, I finally downloaded the Voice Patch and the English Patch for the Visual Novel Clannad. The steps were pretty easy, really. Here are some of the hilarious screenshots I took.











12:26 AM, Thursday. I’m currently munching on cold repast while listening to a heartwarming song entitled “Linkage”. It was sung by Mami Kawada, and did I mention that I was an avid fan of her? Her songs are amazing. The song was too majestic. Too majestic, I couldn’t help but shed manly tears. Her album “Linkage” was only released yesterday, and I managed to download it, despite the slow internet speed. I also uploaded it on the internet, and shared it with my friends. I hope they like it. No. I know they will, without a doubt. Anyway, the song has looped thirteen times already; it’s drilled on my mind. This is yet another case of LSS (Last Song Syndrome). I may be exaggerating, but it feels like my wish has already been granted after listening to “Linkage”. The song sends me shivers down to my spine; it feels like a fleeting dream. Aside from “Linkage”, I also love the song entitled “All in Good Time” from the same album. The first time I heard that was a few months ago, from the ending song of the animu called “Shakugan No Shana S”.

同じ色、同じ空。。。

10:18 AM, Wednesday. The chuckles of working men outside my room disturbed my deep slumber. Apparently, they aren’t done with the renovation yet. Well, of course. They just started a few days ago. Wait. Was that a few weeks ago? I myself don’t remember. The strong, lingering odor of paint penetrates into my nostrils.

10:27 AM, Wednesday. Here I am. Thinking of the next passage I’ll add to my story. I believe it has already been a month now, and I only made little progress. Writer’s Block truly is horrifying. Anyway, I managed to revise the flow of the story. And I daresay that the latter version turned out well. At least, it was better than the previous. Staring at the blank, plain white document, I heaved a sigh. Here’s a little passage from the second chapter.

“Rin appeared to me like the very avatar of hatred. With an overwhelming feeling of terror and uncertainty, my mind suddenly went blank, and I offered her without thinking.”
-Chapter 2, Scarlet

To Scarlet readers out there: What do you think happened to Alaine and Rin? I’ll leave it to your infinite imagination.

10:57 AM, Wednesday. I’m still waiting for Aunt’s breakfast. By the way, have I already mentioned that Win7Ulti’s installation was a success? …I guess I haven’t. Yes, it was a success, albeit my oh-so-calculated seventy percent chance of failure. A friend of mine named Rogger came over to my place, and gave me some installers (the aforesaid OS included) and animu. I paid him 150 pesos for the DVDs, and his transportation fees. I guess I’m back to scratch now. My desktop is almost empty, and I only consumed 20 GBs of Drive C; which I think it was a good thing. Here’s a screenshot of my current desktop.



P.S Counter Strike – I think it’s time I polished my soon-to-be-rusted skills.

11:01 AM, Wednesday. I downloaded Clannad (Visual Novel) the other night. Now I need to download the voice and English-translated patched version later, and also Fate/Stay Night (得ろ下). Yes, F/SN is an eroge/erotic game with a good story. That aside, I managed to give Marble the money (school fees) at school. I, who was wearing only casual clothes and slippers, broke through the school’s layers of security. The guards didn’t notice my presence at all. In that university, wearing freestyle except Wednesdays is prohibited. Too bad I couldn’t use my magical mouth full of lies and excuses. Everything turned out well. So I guess everything’s fine now…

11:05 AM, Wednesday. I wasted Tuesday away. I did nothing but play with my friends till 9 PM. The internet last night was so damn slow I couldn’t even download a single file. It truly was a waste of day, except for my little adventure yesterday. It was fun.

11:45 AM, Wednesday. Aunt finally arrived. She also mentioned that the landlady’s grandchildren will be occupying my room. When? Within this week, perhaps…I haven’t told my parents about this yet. Was that the only reason why the landlady wants me out of this dormitory? I don’t think so. I believe it’s somehow connected to the event previous nights ago. Who knows…or cares? I’ll miss the balcony next to my room. I somehow predicted this was going to happen, but not this soon. Fuck. Now I received a call from mom. My flight may be rebooked this 30th of March depending on the circumstances. The said news made me lose my appetite. I want to escape this place. I want to run away. But will running away change the current situation? I have no choice but to face this harsh reality, because that is what it means to be alive.

Lying Low

10:49 AM, Sunday. Damn it. I forgot what I dreamt of a while ago. It was a bad dream, but not as horrid as a howling nightmare. I woke up to the whining of losing kids next door. They were like “Argh…! No more!” then they would eventually rap the wooden wall dividing our rooms. “Hurry up and leave this place already. I can’t even sleep in peace.” I murmured to myself.

11:02 AM, Sunday. I finally remembered the dream now! I was inside an enemy airship, with a bag of parachute mounted on my back, and a Colt .45 in my left pocket. I was a spy and an assassin at the same time. I was supposed to hunt the commander of the enemy airship. Don’t ask how I infiltrated the airship without the enemy noticing at all. Like I told you, I was an assassin; a perfect one, or so I was told. If I remember correctly, I was with a comrade, but we got separated in the confusion. After a while, the commander told his subordinates that they have arrived at their destination; the subordinates must jump from the airship, and descend with their parachutes. Of course, I was part of it too. The problem was, I didn’t know how to use the parachute. So, I guess I wasn’t really a perfect assassin. Without hesitation, I asked the officers inside the ship. I couldn’t remember what they told me, though. Then, slowly, the world around me disappeared, ending my dream.

11:37 AM, Sunday. I’m still waiting for Aunt to bring me food. Sigh. Anyway, today is the day my Vista OS will be replaced by Win7Ulti OS. I can’t wait, although, the chances of success are only at 30%. You really can’t deny the “sudden power outrage” factor. Well, I just hope that Lady Luck will smile upon me today. Wait, I almost forgot. I revised the second chapter of my story, Scarlet. And I seriously think that this is much better, or should I say, much more realistic, than the previous version. Well, I think the starry sky from last night provided me ideas. I even came up with Rin’s line, “Do you know? The stars represent people’s achieved dreams. They are hanging in the immense, night sky, gleaming intermittently like medals of victory embellished in every corners of a champion’s room. If you have accomplished something in your life, take a good look at the night sky. I’m sure you’ll find your own star, twinkling ever so brightly in that vast expanse!”

Fishballs for Breakfast, Anyone?

12:34 PM, Saturday. ああ。。。気持ち名。。。I had a good, nine hour sleep. I received a message from dad a while ago. He told me to send Uncle Ernie (the relative who sent me a large sum of money yesterday) a “thank you” text message. Inside dad’s message contains Uncle’s cell phone number, too. “Huh…? This number is different from the one he sent to me a few days ago!” I told myself. Dad called in a moment. When I asked him why he sent me two different numbers, he explained to me that the previous number (the number dad sent to me a few nights ago) was Uncle’s landline, and the latter was Uncle’s cell phone number. That means, I’ve been sending text messages not to Uncle’s cell phone number, but to his landline. I was like, “What the heck…? I wasted load…” But meh, it doesn’t matter anymore. Anyway, I successfully deposited 14,500 pesos on my account, and sent 4,500 pesos to my sister.

1:04 PM, Saturday. I finally received our Department Shirt from Nikki. He told me that our shirt ranked second among the other departments. Of course, I got excited. But after seeing the shirt, my high hopes were dashed to smithereens. “The artist’s tastes are becoming dull every year…” I murmured to myself. I seriously didn’t like the shirt, but I guess it was passable. Here are the pictures I took.

Front:


Back:



1:05 PM, Saturday. Oh yes, I remember now. We were defeated by a bunch of highschoolers last night, in a game. Twice, even. It has been ages since we tasted a glass of crushing defeat. They were good. It was fun, but I somehow felt irritated because that loss heavily damaged my Gamer’s Pride. I guess my skills have already rusted. I don’t know, and I wouldn’t know. That aside, I managed to download the remaining parts of 例ある彼女 (Real Kanojo) last night, and the albums of Marble. I was excited. I even violated the curfew (yet again) just for that. I arrived at the dormitory at exactly 10:30 last night. I extracted the files in a certain folder, and installed the game. The installation ended in a few minutes. Well, the game didn’t work on my laptop. It may be within the range of my expectations, but I would be lying if I said that miserable failure didn’t let me down. I spent a week downloading it, after all. I tried to troubleshoot, but to no avail…Well, I already gave up on it. I burned the game in a DVD, just to save my dying hard disk, little space.

1:20 PM, Saturday. I’ve got nothing to do today. Since the final examinations are drawing near, I’ll be expecting less people at the computer shop later. I’m off to trim my nails now, and take a shower afterwards.

A Real Trap!

I was like, OMG! So female-looking men (also known as traps) do exist! I never knew until recently. To be honest, my heart skipped a beat the first time I saw this picture! Oh, and let me tell you. I. AM. STRAIGHT. I know what's on your mind.

Incubi and Deceptions and Cookies accompanied with Strawberry Milk

?:?? AM, Friday. Together with my teammates, we took the portal to an isolated area. If my memory serves me right, that area was a desert. What were we doing there; how we ended up in that place…I have no slight idea. Our objective, too, was unclear. We went inside the huge dome(hereby referred to as "White Dome"). I couldn’t remember properly, but a teammate and I were asked by the group leader (most probably) to go outside. The most probable reason I could think of was, area scouting. My teammate (hereby referred to as “A”) rushed out of the White Dome, and I followed him. I told A to wait up when he suddenly vanished in front of me. His disappearance sent a chill down my spine. It wasn’t only that. I looked back, and the White Dorm’s interior became stark. The White Dome lost its luster, and it transformed into an avatar of horror. Terrified by the sinister building, I turned away, and started running. I told myself, “Where is everybody?!” As I was running around aimlessly, a vehicle came out of nowhere. Inside the vehicle were two of my other teammates (hereby referred to as “Leader” and “Assistant”) I tightly embraced the assistant, and Leader asked me, “What’s wrong?” I told her, “I thought everyone disappeared…” Suddenly, A, together with the rest of the team (hereby referred to as “B” and “C”) arrived to the place where Leader and I were. I was happy. I was certain I wouldn’t be able to see them again. I asked A, “Where did you go?” but, he didn’t give me a clear answer. He was just standing there, looking at me with a stern face. After a while, A told me, that my “soul” had been kidnapped by an evil organization. I was surprised to hear him say that. After a while, he continued. “We…are illusions. What you see right now, is nothing but an illusion…A mirage, a fabrication. Not until you find your kidnapped ‘soul’, the reality you perceive will always be an illusion.” I was asking him, “What should I do?” when A started speaking gibberish all of a sudden. It was, as if he turned into a data slowly getting corrupted by a harmful virus.

?:?? AM, Friday. This is probably the sequel to the previous scene. I was in a dark, hellish place. I was fighting against the Goddess of Madness. She looked like a final boss from certain RPG series. As long as I could remember, it was a battle that would change my fate. Time passed by, and we both came down to our limits. We drew our swords, and rushed towards each other. That single slash decided it all. I won against her, but then, the ground started to crumble, and the world began to fall apart. Apparently, she was like a trigger to the bomb. In the end, it was a lose-lose situation. I never won against her. My fate was already decided from the very beginning. I only challenged her knowing that I would lose. I was lying on the ground, helpless, as if I already accepted my doomed fate. I watched the world fall into ruin as my vision slowly faded to black…

9:34 AM, Friday. I woke up from two, consecutive, seemingly lucid nightmares. I, with mixed feelings, cried on the inside. It was a combination of terror, sorrow and despair. The incubi left a spoiled taste on my mouth. So I munched on cookies and strawberry milk.

11:08 AM, Friday. I’m done eating breakfast. It’s now time to withdraw 20,000 pesos (approx. 444 USD, probably...) Uncle Ernie sent to me last night. Mom also told me that I should send 4,500 pesos to my sister. She needs to pay for her dormitory rent, after all. I’ll deposit the rest of the money afterwards. I’m off to take a shower now.

Within the Borders of the Unexpected

11:05 AM, Thursday. What time did I sleep again last night- I mean, this morning? I can vaguely remember…But, hey, it’s been a while since woke up this late. As I spread out the curtains, I saw mysterious men doing something at the balcony. Dormitory remodelling…I guess? Well, whatever. Aunt brought me food, and a pack of strawberry milk. It’s time to eat.

11:31 AM, Thursday. I received a text message from Marble. Department T-shirts are finally out. I’ll just ask Nikki to bring the pre-ordered shirt to me.

11:51 AM, Thursday. I was playing O2Jam when I let my emotions get the better of me. Frustration consumed me for a moment and I inadvertently slammed the keyboard, and the screen froze up. That was when I encountered the Blue Screen of Death, but only for a second. Then my laptop rebooted automatically. To be honest, I got nervous for a while back there. So I have decided to take a break from gaming for a while, and re-watch some animu instead.

1:43 PM, Thursday. I just re-watched the thirteenth episode of Kimi Kiss. I was like “FFFFFFUU” while hugging my pillow. It was really romantic, and sad, that I almost cried manly tears. I really need this kind of approach for my story. Ah, speaking of stories, there’s still no progress on the story I’ve been writing, albeit the simultaneous popping of ideas on my mind. Should I blame it on Writer’s Block? Or should I blame myself for being lazy? I think I’m just making excuses…I don’t know.

2:05 PM, Thursday. Damn power outrage. Sigh. I just hope today won’t turn out like what happened last night; it was a series of misfortune. I myself don’t even want to talk about it. Stay optimistic, me.

7:59 PM, Thursday. I received 20,000 pesos from Uncle. For no reason at all. It was bliss, but at the same time, it was scary. I'll be depositing this on my account tomorrow morning.

Tomorrow? What is Tomorrow?

10:22 AM, Wednesday. I woke up to the loud sound of crashing cymbals and lively trumpets. I peeked outside the balcony. A parade…Today is March 17, 2010…Hm. What’s the event? I should ask Aunt later.

10:50 AM, Wednesday. I asked Aunt what the parade was all about. She said that today was “Women’s Day”. Well, whatever. I’m not really interested anyway. I’m off to re-watch Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya. I need to gather resources for my little story, after all.

12:12 PM, Wednesday. Salvation hath cometh. It’s just simple post-breakfast consisting of fried scrambled eggs and a few strips of bacon, and of course, a bowl of rice and a pack of chocolate milk. I’ll ask her to buy me strawberry milk tomorrow. Actually, this is the first time I would be eating pork bacon. When I was still living in KSA, I only had chicken or beef bacon for breakfast. Yes. KSA is a Muslim country, so pork is definitely prohibited.

12:26 PM, Wednesday. ああ。。。ご馳走様でした。Okay, then. What should I do now? I’ve got nothing to do, really. Re-watch animu? Read a few novels? Play…? I’m already bound by these chains of recursion. Somebody save me from this agonizing cycle. I’m dying…No. I’m long dead, ever since that day…The day I temporarily abandoned my duty as a student. Oh, Father, I have strayed from the righteous path, and have committed an unforgivable sin, an irretraceable one. I have failed as a good child. My sense of direction was erred by vices. I deserve to suffer from this eternal predicament, but still, I ask for redemption. I am greedy. Greed is evil. Being evil is a sin. Sin is…human…

The Wings of the Seraph

The Wings of the Seraph

The wings of the seraph shine brightly.
The bright light is a pure white color that reveals sins.
The pure white color is the mark of purity.
The mark is the result of one’s actions.
One’s actions represent the future.
The future is time.
Time is uniform.
Uniformity is all.
All is created by the past.
The past is the cause.
There is but one cause.
One is sin.
Sins are humans.
Humans fear, and fear is guilt.
Guilt rests within oneself.
If there is something one despises within,
the wings of the seraph will reveal your sins,
and force it from within you…

...Now where have I seen this passage again?

Title: Twelve days and Counting

10:07 AM, Tuesday. I just woke up, and I just turned my laptop on. I sent my Aunt a text message to bring me food here at the dormitory. I’m too lazy to go out this morning. No. Let me rephrase that. Ever since the start of last year’s second semester, I have always been asking my Aunt to buy me breakfast. You may be asking, “Don’t you have class today?” Well, allow me to answer that. I do have class today, but I already stopped coming to school. How many months has it been since I last attended school? Four months? I can vaguely remember. “Why did I stop attending school?” It’s simple: I got bored. Why? It’s because, my professors are damn lax. Let alone my classmates. Well, it’s a complicated story, and it would take at least nine pages if I put the entire story here. Besides, I have already decided that I’m shifting courses. Goodbye, Computer Engineering, and hello, uncertainty.

10:30 AM, Tuesday: I’m back to my room after washing my face. I’m currently re-reading tidbits’ (a certain user from the forum, Sakurahana) story, while listening to Abingdon Boys School’s awesome album, Abingdon Road. About tidbits’ story, I really liked it. It has this Final Fantasy-esque air, and I’m really interested in those kinds of fictional stories. I only managed to download the first chapter. I’ll be downloading the rest of the chapters after withdrawing my allowance. I’ll be reading mibuchiha’s (yet another user from Sakurahana) story, きれいな星空 (Kirei na Hoshizora/The Starlit Sky of Resplendence -> By the way, the actual translation for it is only Beautiful Starry Sky. Doesn’t “The Starlit Sky of Resplendence” sound cooler than the plain “Beautiful Starry Sky”?), later. Speaking of stories, reading and writing has become a part of my hobby. As for reading, I think it’s more appropriate to say “revived hobby”. And, as for writing, well, I only started writing recently. And I’m getting a lot of Writer’s Block lately. Good thing is, miqo (yes, a fellow user) from Plurk (a social journal) sent me a few sites related to Writer’s Block. Check out one of my favorite quotes below.

“McHugh’s rule of writer’s block: Writer’s block is not the inability to write, it is the feeling as you are writing, and that what you are writing is shit. The only way through it is to give yourself permission to write shit. (You may replace ‘shit’ with colorful euphemisms like ‘cow dung’, or even boring ones like ‘crap’.)” - Maureen McHugh.

11:31 AM, Tuesday. I’m having post-breakfast in my room. Meh, it’s nothing special. It’s only a few slices of meatloaf, a small bowl of Sinigang, a serving of rice and a pack of chocolate milk. And, yes. I paid Aunt 81 pesos for all this. On a random note, I want to get fat as soon as possible. But, I honestly think it will still take a little while.

11:42 AM, Tuesday. ご馳走様でした！ It was a feast. But, to be honest, I’m getting tired of this lifestyle. I want to go back to Riyadh already. I miss my dog, my PS2, and my mom’s cooking. Just a few days more; twelve days to be exact…But, what will I do once I get my arse back there? Procrastinate? Play all day long? Is that all? What is it that I seek, really? I’ll be staying there for only two months, then come back here in the Philippines. Of course, once I get to Riyadh, I’ll be forced to speak out the truth in front of my parents. I’m sure they’ll ask me questions like, “How was school?” or whatever. I’m already prepping myself beforehand, for the twenty-eighth of March, of the year two thousand and ten, is Doomsday. Anyway, I’m off to read mibuchiha’s Kirei na Hoshizora.

1:38 PM, Tuesday. “Is it anger to his fate, or simple animalistic lust? Or is it denial to the cold and harsh truth that this dear girl can’t be his?” an excerpt from chapter 12, Kirei na Hoshizora. Damn it, mibuchiha really is a good writer. I have to learn from him…

2:33 PM, Tuesday. I’m finally done with the eighteenth chapter. It was great, although it was kind of expected. His story is developing beautifully. Well then, I’m off to take a shower, and withdraw money.

5:09 PM, Tuesday. I'm currently downloading the second season of White Album. I missed it. I just hope the subtitles are above decent. Oh, and also, Kalafina's latest album: Red Moon. Gotta thank Nadz for that.

Another Senseless Introduction

Five days has passed since my landlady scolded me from going home late. I still remember the time I got locked outside the dormitory. I sent Monique a text message that I would get home late. Few minutes have passed, and there wasn’t a single reply from her. “Meh…As long as the message reaches her, then there’s nothing to worry about” I told myself.

10:23 PM, Thursday. I’m still at the computer shop, downloading stuff (Anime episodes, Manga chapters, OSTs, Games, you get the picture…) while playing with my friends. I switch tasks from time to time, Alt + TAB, download the twelfth episode of Spice and Wolf, and then switch back to the game, Warcraft III.

1:28 AM, Friday. I managed to download the fifth volume of Nurarihyon no Mago, Kotoko’s album: Uzu-maki, and the remaining episodes of Spice and Wolf’s first season. I saved the files in my USB. I spent seven whole hours at the computer shop; for 80 pesos. Not a bad deal, actually. I also told myself that this would be the last time I would go home late.

1:32 AM, Friday. I reached the dormitory. I also noticed that the gate was already closed. I sent Monique another text message; a pleading message to open the gate. I also called her a lot of times, but to no avail. I braced myself and pressed the doorbell. Oh, and pressing the doorbell means waking the landlady up. And waking the landlady up at this hour is…similar to asking for death. So yes, I pressed the doorbell a couple of times…and the landlady peeked outside of the terrace. I waved at her, and she told me “This is punishment for coming home late”.

1:49 AM, Friday. Someone finally opened the gate. And to my surprise, it was Monique who opened it. So, she was still awake at that hour. Sigh. Expectedly, the landlady gave me a serving of cold sermon. And yes, I finally learned my lesson.